The Warning Signs ™
Everyone, at some point, will date someone who is certifiably insane. It's inevitable.
Crazy people hide inside the bodies of many normal-looking men and women, winning us over with their specious charm and embellished assets, as well as their surprising availability. Why, when "all the good ones are taken," are these people so available? Because they're crazy! And all the good ones really are taken, leaving only sociopathic sexpots for the rest of us.
And therein lies the problem. Some of these toxic paramours are actually kind of good-looking and, possibly, even entertaining. This is what makes it so difficult to distinguish them from that increasingly-finite portion of normal... healthy... self-supporting... mentally-stable... single people.
Just remember: don't mistake "crazy" for "interesting," or "emotionally unbalanced" for "passionate." Beauty is only skin deep. And, for that matter, so is sanity.
That's why the "Warning Signs™" have been compiled -- to help you determine the probability of future emotional and financial ruin resulting from your current relationship, to say nothing of costly and destructive litigation. While the "Warning Signs™" apply to both sexes, they are mostly compiled from research involving female dates and/or spouses in the Los Angeles area. Gender and geographical differences may apply.
The list is a collaborative venture, so please feel free to contribute your own personal "Warning Signs" at firstname.lastname@example.org (put "Warning Signs" in the subject heading).
And lastly, remember: these are only "warning signs." Answering "yes" to any specific question should not rule out a potential mate. It should only be taken for what it is: a warning of potential trouble ahead. Maybe...
© J. Derevlany 2003